My mouth hurts

My mouth still hurts. The sore is right where my teeth meet in the back.  It has been there for almost a week now and it is really getting me down.  This is the only place where I get Crohn's now.  It was actually the very first place it showed up when I was 14.  Except back then I didn't know what it was.  Just thought they were canker sores.  I read once that that is an early sign of Crohn's disease in children.  Mouth sores.  I remember they used to cover the whole inside of my cheek.  I still remember that pain.

I have a Charlie Brown cartoon taped to my fridge.  It's been there for years.  It shows Charlie Brown lying in bed and he says "Sometimes I lie awake at night and wonder Why me?" Then a voice answers, "It's nothing personal, your name came up."  I try to believe that it is just randomness that gave me this hard life dealing with this disease.  Some days I wonder how much more do I have to go through?  Haven't I been through enough? I sometimes believe there has to be a higher purpose for me.  A better reason than randomness that I was chosen.  But after all this time, I still haven't figured it out yet.  Maybe I never will.....